We all go through trying times, and as we age those times grow harder, not easier as one might think. We do build some resilience through our experiences and learn a few tricks to overcome painful moments. We learn to tell ourselves stories, new narratives that make losses more bearable. I’m now practicing gratitude and it’s helping me get through days that are harder than others.

• I lost my grandmother a month ago. I’m grateful I made it to Spain in time to be with her before she passed. I cherished every moment I spent with her and realized how much I loved her. When you love someone, you’ll do anything without question. Nothing scares you. You want to be there with them no matter what. Time flew by and I didn’t want to be anywhere but by her side.
• Relationships that didn’t work out. I’m grateful for every experience because mostly they taught me a lot about myself, what I want to do better next time or simply added friends to my repertoire.
• I’m turning 53. I, as many may feel, never thought it would happen to me. I’m over middle age and starting over. I’m grateful because I’ve reached this age somewhat gracefully. I remind myself that it’s a privilege to make it to yet another day. There’s no guarantee that I’ll wake up to see another day, so this helps me embrace my new journey, new experiences with much less fear.
• I’m facing my life alone but with many invaluable friendships. I’m grateful to enjoy living alone, to not depend on anyone for survival in one of the most expensive states in the US. I don’t take my old or new friends for granted and I know, I’m not alone, but I can choose to be.
• I’m grateful that in the toughest emotional times I didn’t reach for a drink. I didn’t want to be anesthetized. I wanted to actually feel. I’m free of the clutches of the past.
• The last three years have been a rollercoaster ride, but I’m grateful because I got through them with the help of friends and family. I learned I was tough and that I have plenty of endurance.
• When I was younger I couldn’t cry. Now, I’m much more emotional and things touch me more deeply. I’m grateful for being able to be so moved that I find tears rolling more easily down my cheeks. I’m more attached and connected to life and people, so the result is sometimes a bit painful.

Experiencing gratitude even when things don’t go as I wish, helps me view life in a more positive light, and find inner peace. It’s working for me. I really suggest you try it.