Today we scattered Dearest Drew’s ashes by the sea and the trails she so much loved to run, where all San Franciscan dogs come to play and roam free. It felt like closure. I was able to say goodbye to my dear companion and friend.

Those who don’t have dogs can’t really understand how much a dog’s love can do for you. Sometimes, even more so than humans. She was a rescue dog, but she rescued me when I needed to feel loved so badly. Drew came into my life right at that moment when you think you can barely breathe or take the next step. I was paralyzed by fear and she took all that away and more. She gave me love and understanding, besides a reason to live. I tried to take care of her, although it was really the other way round.

Drew asked no questions, just looked at me and told me in her own way what she needed, and she let me hug her. We spoiled each other rotten. We spent evenings simply chilling and when she could, we went for walks. She was not young, but neither am I, so we were the perfect match.

Today, as I walked into her home to get her ashes and go set them free in nature with her dads, I missed her coming to greet me as she used to as if I were the most amazing person in the world. I don’t think anyone has ever been so happy to see me, truly.

This was the first time I spread ashes, and now I understand the freedom and joy of letting them go because it feels like Drew is still part of life. She’s by us and with us.