We have to talk…

It was a year ago, on a Friday, when my life as I knew it vanished. I’m in no way mourning it, but remembering it because it’s one of those dates that change our lives completely. ‘We have to talk.” He was able to say what I didn’t dare to, and for that I admire […]

Read More…

Why I choose to wear “give-up” clothes

The other night, my friend and I watched a movie where this woman was chastising her recently divorced friend because she was wearing “give-up clothes.” While I found it hilarious it wasn’t so funny when my own friend looked at me and said, “Don’t laugh so hard because you are wearing give-up clothes around the […]

Read More…

Breaking unhealthy relationship cycles.

Wayne Dyer said, his mother fell into really unhealthy relationships. It became a pattern. One after another, all the men she fell for were alcoholic, abusive in some way and very bad parents, of course. She never broke the cycle and the children had to suffer for it. She is not alone. Many men and women […]

Read More…
Defining marital status

Marital statuses don’t define us​

We keep wanting to classify people as if this would in some way  give us a much better clue about a person’s identity and build a clearer picture of who they are. But, a marital status doesn’t define us and in some cases, it’s best not to disclose because of the negative implications. As is the “divorced” […]

Read More…

The importance of mourning loss

I thought that the best cure for pain was getting busy and trying to forget at any cost what had transpired. But it doesn’t work that way. Or at least it hasn’t worked for me. Those solutions are temporary. Getting over pain takes a period of mourning. Now, I’m at that point, and I’m not […]

Read More…

Those scary places.

Once in a while when your safety blanket of comfort has been taken away, and everything is new, you have to reinvent your life and make it fit again, but it’s a scary place to be at. Change is scary because of its newness and unpredictability and you find yourself holding your breath hoping it will […]

Read More…
How to be emotionally stable: chill

How I became chill

I’m chill, says my eldest niece. I don’t get angry or too excited. I agree, but it didn’t use to be this way. It’s taken a time to get to a place where I don’t have to control my emotions and go to extremes which, is very challenging and emotionally draining. I lost my anger at […]

Read More…