Becoming soft hearted

My dear friend Tom told me once that I was as tough-hearted as a dude, whatever he meant by that. This was about 24 years ago and somewhere along the line, I became very soft-hearted. Looking back, I do understand where he came from. We used to date before we became best friends and that was the reason we didn’t make it, I was too tough-hearted.

It takes time, years, to understand oneself, to break down and rebuild. Especially to open your heart and become vulnerable because this means you can get hurt, so that was not something I was ready to have. Even when I got married I couldn’t let my guard down. So, in the end, the boat sunk, yet again. Maybe it was during the last years of my marriage that I became soft and started to miss someone with whom I could be totally vulnerable with. However, it was not a person I found but two adorable pups; Sparky and my dear Drew that showed me and helped me let my guard down, love and be loved unconditionally. Yep, crazy as it may sound, they taught me more about myself than any human being.

My two pups made me soft and I miss them terribly. I cannot wait to have another pup in my life. (I’m officially a pup huger).

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