When my friend asked how I was doing, I wasn’t able to answer with the typical courtesy of: “just fine.” Because, In fact, I was doing worse tan I thought. It all came out like a cascade with almost no time to take a breath in between all the things that had gone wrong in the last couple of months.
My dear friend sat there patiently, nodding, and taking in all my emotional purging. When I finally paused, he said: “That’s why I asked how you were doing.” I apologized because I don’t like to put so much on other people, I also didn’t expect to have so much to say either. But after all, we are friends and this is what friends are for, and it felt good to have someone, not only listen, but share their own similar story of pain, loss and misfortunes. Only by sharing what is really happening in our minds and life, can we open up to a dialogue that will make us feel less alone.
So, when a close friend asks you how you are doing, spill the beans, because that is when the healing begins and the friendship blooms.