The ifs that have become my blessings

I’m not afraid for once of what is to come. I’ve learned a lot in the past couple of years, especially about survival and friendship. I’m not alone in this boat, although I may be alone battling my own fight. I’m in a good place now, and grateful for every single obstacle that got me here. […]

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I finally have no resolutions for 2017

I have no resolutions for 2017. Every year I used to write a long list of things I hoped to achieve. Some, I often realized were not even things I really wanted. I just jotted them down believing these were things I had to do to make myself and others happy. Now, on second thought, I […]

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Fifty: payback time

All those fun parties, sleepless nights, stress and some gold old drugs in your youth come at a price once you turn fifty. But, it’s inevitable. When you are young you think you are immune to everything, as it should be. Living a super conscious and cautious life in your youth is no way to live. Some […]

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When I want to die

Maybe I shouldn’t say this, but sometimes when I’m down and life gets too hard, it helps me to say aloud, with no one around, that I want to die. How can this help? It does, and a lot. Saying and acknowledging this feeling, this wanting to die, is like choosing to live. I let it […]

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Stop questioning life and start living

As a kid, I wondered what life was about and now I finally know. Life is about what is important to you. Life is a string of moments that become our lives. We borrow life to later return it. There’s no complicated universal explanation. And it’s very simple; we breathe, we stop breathing. What’s complicated […]

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The road to getting well is bumpy

Nothing could have prepared me for all this sudden change. As scary as change has always been for me, now I welcome it. I’m reaping the benefits of living in a constant state of uncertainty and have learned that the road to getting well emotionally and physically is always bumpy. All the bumps, potholes, turns, […]

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The importance of mourning loss

I thought that the best cure for pain was getting busy and trying to forget at any cost what had transpired. But it doesn’t work that way. Or at least it hasn’t worked for me. Those solutions are temporary. Getting over pain takes a period of mourning. Now, I’m at that point, and I’m not […]

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