Was I ever really married?

After an evening out with friends sharing laughs, inner demons, and philosophical chat I  came back home to find a letter from some Diocese letting me know that my ex-husband is getting married in the Catholic Church. It was no surprise, he had already told me, – thank God for text- yet, this letter made me realize how I couldn’t imagine ever being married. It’s been almost three years since we separated, and I feel that was someone else’s life. It didn’t sting, it just felt surreal that I ever shared a life with someone for 17 years.

It’s even harder to imagine myself getting married again, or having another lasting relationship at all. In the past three years following my separation, I was too busy getting my life together again, so, finding someone or even contemplating the idea was last on my list. I have never been one to seek anyway.  I did try, but it was too soon and now, it’s probably too late. I’m not being negative, just realistic.

However, I’m happy and relieved to know that some people do get second chances or even third chances. Meanwhile, I’ll keep enjoying my new life, my probably second and last chapter knowing that there may be limited stock for me and that’s OK.

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