That acute sense of reality…

I read somewhere that people who suffer depression simply have an overly acute sense of reality. While I don’t dig into the depths of those muddy waters, or don’t spend too long immersed in them, I do believe it’s true. I don’t think that depression comes from negative thinking, but from that sense of reality where you see life as is, with no pretty filters. We all have our belief systems, that arise from our life experiences, and that’s what we have to work with. It’s not a bad thing unless you stay there too long, and don’t allow some hope and light to settle in. Life is hard. Period. Seen that way, life can actually surprise you and bring you moments of utterly unforgettable happiness.

I’m naive in many ways because I still believe in long-lasting friendships, human kindness, and best intentions, however, there are many things that I don’t believe in and this is where the acute sense of reality kicks in for me.

  • I don’t believe in long-lasting love. The newness subsides, and faster as we age.
  • I don’t believe in politicians. Just follow the money…
  • I don’t believe in any organized religion… Follow the money again…
  • I don’t believe in “chance.”
  • I don’t believe in miracles.
  • I don’t believe in happiness as a constant state, but random happy moments strung together with a lot of sad in between and more as we grow older and our sense of wonder slowly diminishes.
  • I don’t believe words said when in love. They don’t last a mile.
  • I don’t believe we all are born with a purpose, we have to find our own.
  • I don’t even believe that being hopeful is always good. Hope can blind us if we are not careful, having us cling to what is not meant to be.
  • The hardest truth I believe in is that we all die alone. We come to the world with nothing and leave the same way. It’s kind of comforting to know this. It makes being alone much more “normal” and “acceptable.”

Note, that as I write this I’m content and happy because although my beliefs may be somewhat raw, I still enjoy life, and maybe, I accrue happier moments because I don’t expect them.



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