I’m in no way an expert in love, but I do know what hasn’t worked for me, or what I’ve seen in other relationships that hasn’t worked either. In this light, I am well aware that certain things don’t fall into the category of love.What love is NOT in my book:
- A battle to be fought.
- Living in fear of the next shoe to drop.
- A “job” that requires so much energy that you feel drained every day.
- A careless afterthought.
- A duty.
- Being with someone for the sake of not being alone. (In such a case, you are marrying loneliness.)
- Putting up with behaviors you wouldn’t even accept from a dear friend.
- Ignoring problems hoping they will go away.
- A place to dump all your life frustrations.
- Only taking.
- An imposition.
- Criticizing the other constantly.
- “This is mine and that is yours.”
- An obsession. (That is only part of the pink cloud and the lust at the beginning of the relationship. After that, it’s sick.)
- A possession.
- What you say but what you do.
In the end, it’s a hit and miss, until you get it right. By that time, you may have taken a few hard knocks. Yet, you haven’t failed, you were simply feeling your way and learning.