Why you shouldn’t spare people’s feelings.


 by Simona Robová

Respect people by telling them how you feel Photograph by Simona Robová

I admire and respect people who have the courage to honestly express how they really feel and think. And I don’t mean rude, mean blunt thoughtless honesty; I mean the type of honesty that however hurtful it might be for the other person, it will help them know where they stand. 

Sparing people’s feelings is just a way to make yourself feel OK. It’s selfish and pretty close to lying. Maybe we should know the truth in order to be able to make clear decisions no mater how much the truth hurts at that moment.

My best friends are brutally honest and they have all my respect. Having them tell me the ugly truth often has shaken me awake, helped me to move on and make decisions I was afraid to make which also saved me a lot of time.

Sparing people’s feelings might only hurt more when years later you tell them: “I didn’t want to tell you then, but I saw it coming.” So, what does this say about the relationship? I rather have the truth broken to me as soon as possible than have it trickle out and have me second-guessing, drawing out the inevitable.

If you respect someone, be straight; be truthful, as painful as it might be. It saves time and long drawn-out doubt and discomfort.

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